How to Get a Piece of Peace in Your Life

Thursday, May 26, 2005

On Forgiveness

"Forgiveness offers the possibility of two types of peace: peace of mind -- the potential healing of old emotional wounds, and peace with others -- the possibility of new, more gratifying relationships in the future." -- Kenneth I. Pargament & Mark S. Rye

It can be the hardest thing to do. Yet when we do not forgive, we are choosing to hold on to something that gives us pain and ultimately turns into suffering.

You may feel as though others do not deserve your forgiveness. Ask yourself, "How does the lack of forgiveness affect that other person's life?" Now ask yourself, "How does the lack of forgiveness affect my life?"

Forgiveness has been shown to reduce negative emotions and physical discomforts and increase joy and satisfying relationships. Visit this website to see more research on forgiveness:

Forgiveness is a way to heal.

You do not have to let others know that you have forgiven them. You do not need to become close to others who have caused you pain. These things are your choice. Forgiveness is your choice as well.

Take a moment to sit quietly, close your eyes, picture someone who has hurt you, and grant them forgiveness in your heart. Take another moment to ask for someone's forgiveness. Then take a moment to forgive yourself of something in your past. Notice how you feel after you have done this. If you feel tight, angry, hurt, or resistant, try it again at another time. Forgiveness does not happen in one sitting. It is something to work toward once you are ready. It is also something that you do for no one else but yourself.